Archive for September, 2009

iphone goes Orange

Monday, September 28th, 2009

Orange iphone

O2′s stranglehold on designers and media types across the UK will soon come to an end, thanks to the expiration of it’s exclusive deal to provide Apple’s iPhone. Rival Orange is muscling in on the action, and in a brief statement released this morning announced that it would be offering app-hungry consumers a chance to get a piece of Britain’s coolest brand later this year.

“Orange UK and Apple have reached an agreement to bring iPhone 3G and 3GS to Orange UK customers later this year,” it said. “Orange, which has the largest 3G network covering more people in the UK than any other operator, will sell iPhone in all Orange direct channels including Orange shops, the Orange webshop and Orange telesales channels, as well as selected high street partners.”

Details are scarce, with no exact dates or pricing plans confirmed. It’ll be interesting to see if 02′s arguably inflated tarriffs are undercut though, and the stage could be set for a juicy pre-Christmas price war. If Orange’s proposed merger with the UK arm of T-Mobile goes through, the iPhone will be available to a rather hefty customer base of more than 49 million across the UK.

I’m going to party, like it’s… a Windows 7 party

Thursday, September 24th, 2009

Not satisfied with creating the worst operating system ever, Microsoft seem set to do the same in advertising. I do hope they are being ironic in this Microsoft 7 ‘Party’ advert.

Why yes I will go to the website and download an activity sheet for me and my demographically engineered group of friends to get involved in. Let’s hope it consists of drink, drugs and fucking cause that is sure as hell going to be a lot more fun than installing a dubious operating system.

Parodies are coming in thick and fast.

Sega, Capcom and Hideo Kojima on Project Natal

Thursday, September 24th, 2009

Sega’s Toshihiro Nagoshi, Capcom’s Keiji Inafune and Konami’s Hideo Kojima. discussed the possibilities of Microsoft’s Project Natal during a panel discussion at the Tokyo Game Show. A couple of choice quotes below…

Inafune: “This technology surpasses anything we have at the same time as treasuring the current tradition. I see the potential of Natal, and it’s not just a traditional fad.”

“We have to be role models with Natal and act responsibly. We can lead people and show them the potential of Natal. We [game developers] are serious people, and we can lead the rest of the world to this new technology.”

Kojima: “Using Natal, I’d like to come up with a completely new game that no one has seen before. I know I have lots of fans that are loyal to me, and I don’t want to leave them behind. So maybe I can come up with a car that can fly, so my fans can follow me. Metaphorically speaking, of course.”

The technology certainly is impressive and we’ll likely see it applied in some pretty cool ways. Uses may even extend beyond traditional gaming (minority report style menu interface anyone?) but quite frankly i can’t be arsed throwing kicks and swinging an imaginary sword for a game of Soul Caliber, plus as responsive as it is, it’s hard to imagine that Natal will offer quite the same level of precision as a traditional pad, or keyboard and mouse setup.

As an aside, I can’t help but wish a painful death on the family in Microsoft’s advert (above), but maybe that’s just me.

More at Gamespot, Gamasutra and CVG.

Drug busts are Wii-ly fun

Wednesday, September 23rd, 2009

What I like most about the Nintendo Wii is the way it manages to span so many different demographics in providing good clean fun. Witness exhibit A above for proof.

Donut loving police officers from an anti-drug task force raiding the home of a friendly neighbourhood dealer in Florida decided they couldn’t resist a few frames of Wii bowling in between ransacking the house for baggies of meth. Unfortunately for them however, they were unaware of a surveillance camera which had been set up before the raid.

Bit of a gutter ball there (sorry, but at least I didn’t say “game over”).

Via AP

More video here

Rise of the machines

Monday, September 21st, 2009

Yet more indications of humanity’s impending destruction at the cold mechanised hands of killer robots have surfaced over the last few days.

They’re already outdoing us at athletic feats: Darpa has funded a robot which can leap over obstacles more than 7.5m high thanks to a piston-actuated “leg”, while Sandia National Laboratories has been showing off some grasshopper inspired mechanical critters of their own.

Soon, even your favourite drinking den won’t be safe, thanks to Deep Green, a pool playing robot which is already “better-than-amateur level” (check out the link for some cool augmented reality stuff too).

There is some slight consolation in that even your average couch dweller could probably still run rings around Hajime Sakamoto‘s football playing robot. Still, it’s probably only a matter of time until he achieves his dream of “building Gundam” though

To avoid a premature and painful death dished out by a blood thirsty automaton hell-bent on eliminating the human race, you could always shack up with one first, after all, David Levy thinks shagbots are just round the corner.

Just released! Noel Edmonds Cosmic Ordering App!

Friday, September 18th, 2009
Screenshots from the Cosmic Ordering App

Screenshots from the Cosmic Ordering App

Do like Noel Edmonds? Do you ever wish you had an iPhone application that combined a to-do list and a big picture of Noel Edmonds FACE? Well look no further, it’s yours from the App Store for a mere one hundred and nineteen British pennies! It is essentially a glorified to do list, and we here at The Processor can’t live without it. Number one interestingly on my ‘Cosmic Order’ is to watch more Deal or No Deal, how did that get there?

Google.gov?

Wednesday, September 16th, 2009

Obama Google

Yesterday, the U.S. Government federal chief information officer, Vivek Kundra, launched a new website called Apps.gov that enabled the purchase and implementation of cloud computing services for government departments for cost cutting/energy saving.

Google’s founder, Sergey Brin, was so excited about it that he drove all the way to the launch to announce that he would dedicate vast chunks of Google’s servers to enable the Obama administration to achieve it’s goal of modernizing the government’s information technology systems.

Just in the same way the relationship between church and the state in the UK is slightly dubious, with the head of state also being the head of the Church of England. The same could be said about the new relationship in the U.S. between Google and their government.

What Google will get out of this, in affect sale of Government data, is a scary thought for the population of the states. While cloud computing has it’s benefits for simple low level information, the fact that it may get it’s hands on medical records and tax information, is scary.

So now it knows where you live, that you have persistant diarrhea, and that you may be interested in not paying your taxes. Great.

Found via

Kotick “takes fun out of making games”

Tuesday, September 15th, 2009

Activision Blizzard CEO Robert Kotick’s presentation at the Deutsche Bank Securities Technology Conference in San Francisco yesterday has been widely reported, with most sites leading with his comments on playing Guitar Hero without a console.

However, there were some other interesting, bits in there too, especially seeing as i subscribe to Bill Wyman’s stance on the whole music game phenomenom (I should stress I don’t share his views on the acceptibility of dating 13 year olds though).

When not extolling the benefits of console-less plastic instrument bashing, Konick boasted of the business acumin which helped Activision net a sevenfold increase in profits last quarter. In particular, the heartwarming measure of designing the employee incentive program so that it “rewards profit and nothing else”.

“We have a real culture of thrift,” Konick continued. “The goal that I had in bringing a lot of the packaged goods folks into Activision about 10 years ago was to take all the fun out of making video games.”

A commendable aim if ever there was one…

Less controversially, Kotick also spoke about new realtime rendering and mouth movement technology Activision has been working on, commenting that “Call of Duty: World at War didn’t have proper facial expressions for players to get emotionally attracted”. It’s a fair point, the facial animation in Call of Duty isn’t up to scratch. Nevertheless, away from Activision, some games look to be doing it rather better, Heavy Rain for example.

The new animation system won’t be ready for some time, but it should arrive before the next generation of consoles, Kotick said. This doesn’t represent a particularly strict timeline however, as he added that publishers aren’t currently taking full advantage of the the current generation of hardware and he would normally expect about two years notice from the hardware manufacturers before introducing a new console. something which, to date, he hasn’t recieved.

More at Gamespot.

PS3 slim sales pass 500,000

Monday, September 14th, 2009

Sales of the newly slimmed down PS3 have comfortably exceeded half a million worldwide, according to numerous reports.

Purchases in the US increased three fold the week of its launch, according to Sony. While research group Chart-Track said the new console sold 40,000 units in its first week on the UK market, boosting sales 999%.

In Japan, the PS3 sold 151,783 units during its first three days on sale – up from around 1,000 per week- possibly thanks to the bizarre advertising campaign (above).

Of course, percentage increases will be skewed somewhat by the fact that sales were likely very low the week prior to the Slim’s release as prospective buyers waited for the new model. Nevertheless, the numbers are impressive, and Sony seem to have pulled off a strong candidate for the most succesful console relaunch ever.

The real question is whether Sony will be able to keep up momentum and move out of last place in the home console market.

If it doesn’t, it won’t be from lack of trying. A new console at a lower price point coupled with a re-branded logo and a new advertising campaign could well be enough to erode the faintly elitist, unattainable feel of the original console and tempt mass-market consumers to splash out on what is arguably the best value package on the market.

In vaguely related news, the PS3 now accounts for more BBC iPlayer views than Apple computers. Viewers using Sony’s black box made up 10% of all traffic compared to 8.5% of Jobs devotees.

BREAKING NEWS! Pigs may fly!

Thursday, September 10th, 2009
Image of rat flying, pigs to follow!

Image of rat flying, pigs to follow!

Yep that’s right, you heard it here first (well courtesy of Gizmodo)! NASA scientists at the Jet Propulsion Laboratory in Pasadena, California, have created a room temperature anti-gravity field that is capable of lifting small animals.

First on their list, although we cannot quote on this, is to make pigs fly, then to start work on something we have all craved since Back to the Future II, a Hover Board!